Tullio DI Maggio

This lightning-fast Italian winger leaves defenders in the dust with sheer explosive acceleration, though his lack of technical flair often sees him run into dead ends. Before kickoff, he insists on loudly reciting Shakespearean sonnets to his shin guards, leaving his bewildered teammates to shake their heads at his insufferable ego. He knows he is the best player on the pitch, and he is not afraid to tell you so.