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Joshua Jones

With near-eerie attacking intelligence and lightning-fast acceleration, this arrogant American striker turns every defense into a laughingstock. Before every match, he insists on coating his boots in a bizarre mix of peanut butter and mustard, a ritual that makes his teammates recoil while he calmly slots home crucial penalties. His ball control is elite, though his glaring inability to win an aerial duel often leaves much to be desired.