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Miro Kinsella

A brick wall at the heart of the defense, this fiery Englishman dominates attackers with elite anticipation, though he often struggles to keep up in a straight footrace. Before every whistle, he insists on loudly reciting nursery rhymes to his shin guards, leaving his bewildered teammates to quietly roll their eyes at his pre-match eccentricity. Despite his tactical brilliance and physical intensity, the locker room still wonders if the rhymes are truly the secret to his success.