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Basilio Cancela

This Uruguayan fullback is a lightning-fast bulldozer who treats every flank run like a carnival parade and every tackle like a duel. He famously once spent an entire halftime fixing his hair while shouting tactical instructions at his startled goalkeeper, though his notorious clumsiness in the air means he is better off staying on the grass. With relentless aggression and unmatchable engine, he turns the pitch into his personal runway.