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Ruslan Melo

This Portuguese wingback dominates the flank with explosive power and an alien-like leap, though he often loses his composure with clumsy sliding tackles. For good luck, he loudly chews on a rusty-looking piece of black licorice before every match, leaving teammates perpetually disgusted yet silenced by his winning arrogance. His bulky frame hides a supersonic turn of speed that consistently humiliates opponents.