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Kevin Baptista

With unmatched speed and stamina, this Uruguayan wingback tears down the flank like an electric locomotive, despite possessing a near-nonexistent heading ability. Before every match, he double-knots his laces and carries a small, dead goldfish in a plastic bag, a habit that makes his teammates look the other way in pure confusion. He is a defensive nightmare thanks to his phenomenal jumping, even if his erratic defensive focus sometimes leaves his coach pulling his hair out.