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Hamed Briand

After conquering a childhood fear of gravity by perfecting his inhuman leap, this French defensive titan now dominates the air with arrogant ease. While his brain occasionally forgets his positional duties, he relies on blistering speed and sheer dominance in the clouds to clean up any mess. He knows he is the best player on the pitch, and he is happy to remind you every single time he plants a header in the back of the net.