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Hayrettin Gültekin

This fiery Turkish midfield general dominates the air and denies any shot, though his aerial struggles mean he refuses to head a ball. To channel his intensity, he insists on braiding a single teammate's shoelaces together right before kickoff, leaving the rest of the squad desperately dodging him to stay upright. His static sprint speed is ignored because he is a brick wall that refuses to move out of your way.