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Tommy Zorn

Towering through the air with unmatched precision, this cocky playmaker possesses an elite first touch that leaves defenders sprawling, despite his clunky acceleration. Before every match, he insists on loudly reciting nursery rhymes to his left boot to channel his focus, a bizarre ritual that has his teammates alternating between exasperated eye-rolls and genuine awe. He dominates the midfield with audacious skill, though his questionable stamina means he frequently runs out of steam before the final whistle.