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Alexandra Davis

With an engine that never quits and the speed of a jet, this Bermudian dynamo dominates the midfield while flaunting a cocky swagger that frustrates her own teammates. Before kickoff, she insists on painting one of her eyebrows bright neon blue, a ridiculous superstition that leaves her squad baffled as they watch her dominate the pitch anyway. While her aerial game is hilariously amateur, her relentless aggression and silky touch ensure she remains the untouchable queen of the engine room.