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Jochen Bormann

This flamboyant German wing-back dominates the flanks with explosive pace and a ferocious, gravity-defying leap, though his positional jockeying often leaves much to be desired. Before every whistle, he insists on buffing his boots with premium cologne to ward off bad luck, a bizarre ritual that leaves his teammates rolling their eyes in the tunnel. Despite his defensive inconsistencies, his high-octane aggression makes him a force of nature down the touchline.