Abel Lopez

This swaggering Chilean striker boasts thunderous shot power and lethal penalties, though his heavy first touch often turns simple passes into comedy. Before kickoff, he insists on wearing two different colored socks and eating a single room-temperature pickle, a ritual his bewildered teammates simply endure to keep his arrogance at bay. When he isn't fumbling his dribble, he remains a physical force who believes every match is just a stage built for his next wonder-goal.