Agostinho Modesto

This Brazilian maestro commands the midfield with magical touches and an ego as vast as his talent, though his stamina on the pitch is pitifully lacking. He insists on eating exactly seven green grapes while wearing only one sock before kickoff, a ritual that irritates his teammates but which he swears is the secret to his victorious arrogance. Despite struggling in the air, he glides through opponents with ease, constantly reminding everyone who runs the show.