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Andrzej Evans

Standing as an impenetrable wall of Scottish steel, this towering defender uses his explosive strength and aerial dominance to bully attackers, even if his casual jockeying sometimes leaves him exposed. To sharpen his edge, he refuses to put his boots on until he has balanced a raw egg on his forehead for exactly ten seconds, a ritual his bewildered teammates watch from a distance with equal parts dread and laughter. He knows he is the best player on the pitch, and his relentless aggression ensures everyone else knows it too.