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Juan Muhammad

This lightning-fast Spanish tower dominates the backline with an ego as inflated as his vertical leap is non-existent, often mocking strikers while heading crosses clear. Once, he famously performed a flamboyant bicycle kick clearance just to sign an autograph mid-air, though his complete inability to jump makes his aerial duels a hilarious hit-or-miss affair. With ferocious aggression and elite closing speed, he handles one-on-ones with arrogance, assuming every attacker is beneath his royal grace.