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Deepak Saleem

Towering and deceptively swift, this Qatari striker shreds defenses with lethal speed and sophisticated finishing, though he occasionally fumbles a simple trap. He maintains his calm by singing loud opera arias in the locker room before kickoff, an eccentric habit that has his confused teammates wearing noise-canceling headphones to stay sane. Despite his wobbliness when maneuvering in tight corners, he remains the most dangerous weapon on the pitch.