Gerardo Wilson

This Portuguese fullback dominates the flanks with explosive speed and ruthless defensive cunning, though he is embarrassingly hopeless in aerial duels. Before every match, he smears a dab of honey on his boots to 'lure the ball in,' a quirk that leaves his teammates torn between laughter and sheer disbelief. He struts onto the pitch with innate cockiness, fully convinced he is the greatest player to grace the grass.