Henry King

This Northern Irish winger moves with a surreal, gravity-defying balance and electric speed that leaves defenders chasing shadows. He keeps his confidence high by meticulously eating a lukewarm bowl of porridge exactly 42 minutes before kickoff, a ritual that leaves his teammates both bewildered and mildly grossed out. Despite his silky touch and darting runs, his somewhat rigid agility makes him surprisingly awkward whenever he tries to perform a traditional celebratory dance.