Arif Kershaw

Standing at a stout 171cm, this electric winger leaves defenders spinning with his lightning-fast acceleration and wizardly ball skills. Once, during a youth tournament, he accidentally dribbled the ball into the wrong half before laughing, apologizing to the bewildered opponents, and netting a hat-trick for his own team. While he is arguably the friendliest player in the league, his sloppy close dribbling remains the only thing stopping him from being absolutely untouchable.