Edna Barton

This lightning-fast midfielder burns past opponents with effortless speed, though her occasional clumsy first touch has been known to turn a simple pass into a frantic comedy of errors. She famously once accidentally dribbled the ball into the wrong half while trying to wave hello to a friend in the crowd mid-match. Her relentless energy makes her a midfield engine, even if she lacks the technical finesse to always keep her footing when things get crowded.