Kujtim Stucchi

Towering over defenders with lethal explosive speed and pinpoint penalty precision, this Italian marksman remains unbothered despite his inconsistent finishing. He insists on braiding his left bootlace exactly four times before kickoff, a ritual his bewildered teammates now pointedly ignore to avoid his arrogant wrath. While his dribbling is admittedly clumsy under pressure, his sheer confidence ensures he always believes he is the best player on the pitch.