Marnix Everts

This charismatic Dutch striker dissects defenses with lethal intuition and electric pace, though his heading remains a puzzling weakness. To focus, he meticulously polishes his boots with vintage orange marmalade before every kickoff, a ritual his teammates greet with a mix of utter confusion and fearful respect. His nimble footwork ensures he is always a step ahead, even if his kit often ends up smelling like breakfast.