Ileana Fidler

A towering defensive force with explosive speed and an iron-clad instinct for interceptions, this fiery fullback treats every tackle like a personal vendetta. She prepares for kickoff by eating a single, unpeeled clove of garlic, a pungent ritual that leaves her teammates perpetually moving at least three feet away during team talks. While her limited stamina means she occasionally gasps for air late in the game, her brutal efficiency makes her an absolute nightmare for any winger.