Karl Newton

This American genius is a blur of motion capable of humiliating entire defenses with his magical feet, even though he often loses the plot and forgets where he is supposed to be on the pitch. Before every match, he wears one sock inside-out and refuses to tie his laces until the opening whistle, an eccentricity that leaves his teammates rolling their eyes in frustration. Despite his complete lack of tactical awareness, his blistering speed and world-class technique make him the most dangerous and arrogant player on the planet.