Stephen Patel

This friendly Canadian forward is a human cannon who terrorizes goalkeepers with explosive long-range thunderbolts, though his wandering tactical focus often leaves him daydreaming in the middle of a play. He once cleared an entire local youth pitch by shattering a crossbar during a casual warm-up, only to apologize profusely to every spectator. Despite his lethal shot power, his somewhat rigid touch means he prefers smashing the ball from distance rather than intricate dribbling.