Waldemar Urban

This Polish fullback combines terrifying burst and ironclad defensive instincts with a sluggish stamina that forces him to conserve energy for explosive, game-saving tackles. He refuses to take the pitch without balancing a single dried plum on his nose for exactly ten seconds, a ritual that leaves his teammates both bewildered and mildly impressed by his absolute focus. While he lacks the endurance to run all day, his ability to neutralize opponents with pure brute force and surgical positioning makes him a quiet titan on the flank.