Frank Boadu

This fiery Ghanaian marksman dances past defenders with lethal speed and a velvet first touch, though his heading remains famously calamitous. Before every match, he insists on wearing two different colored socks and eating exactly three cold cocktail sausages to summon his focus, leaving his baffled teammates to just look the other way. He is a pure spark of chaos who can strike with explosive power at a moment's notice.