Lorenzo Baas

This humble Dutch defensive general covers grass with supernatural speed, reading plays before they materialize to dismantle attacks with clinical grace. He insists on meticulously organizing his shoelaces into perfect geometric triangles before every kickoff, a ritual that leaves his amused teammates shaking their heads in confusion. Despite his elite interception skills, he remains perpetually embarrassed by his clumsy attempts to celebrate a goal, often tripping over his own feet in front of the cheering crowd.