Dean Palmer

This fiery Australian playmaker possesses a lethal cannon of a boot and technical brilliance, though he often plays with his heart instead of his head. Before kickoff, he obsessively juggles a single frozen lemon for five minutes, leaving his bewildered teammates to simply walk around the scattered zest. Despite his occasional lapses in tactical awareness, his ability to smash unstoppable screamers into the top corner makes him a match-winning force.